Amy's Mama Drama

WTF?! - Weight loss story #5

Okay, so I owed everyone my big weight loss plan last week and I didn't deliver. So much for public blogging as my accountability system. However, I have, once again, an excuse. And that is: raw food books. That's right, I'm blaming my dieting delay on the entire raw foods movement.

Because I think I've got the exercise thing down. A plan, anyway. And I thought I had the food thing down too, but then I picked up a raw foods book, and it threw me. After being sure that I was going for whole wheat bread and pasta, fish, and plenty of fruits & veggies, this book (that shall remain nameless - mostly because I read it on the floor of the bookstore because I was too cheap to buy it and now can't remember the name) claimed that processed grains are bad for you and you should stay away from all breads and pastas and even brown rice. Yikes!

It had recipes with soaked nuts and "sprouted grains" and home-dehydrated combos of both.

Hmmm. I think we might be outta my league with this one, I thought. Because I struggle with finding the time to shower myself, let alone bathe my food. There is no way I can become a full service nut spa.

So I'm a little off my game, not to mention my time line. Oh, I'll be back - once I figure out how to take all the best the book had to offer, without spending 5 hours a day re-learning how to prepare food. But rest assured there will be no almond baths or barley reconstitution in my game plan.

Hope that all works for ya.

Weight Loss Wednesdays: weight loss story #4

I think the car accident excuse has expired, so it's time to stop avoiding the fat fight. But I do think that I've accomplished something during my procrastination - I've been observing my habits. Don't laugh, observation can be a powerful thing. Not quite as powerful as change, but it's a start. Here are some factors that I need to account for in my Battle Plan:

1. I need exercise I think is fun, or I will never keep it up.

2. I need to eat little bits of good food all day, so I don't get so hungry I can rationalize chocolate lava cake with raspberry sauce into a "rainbow food".

3. Sugar after 9pm is my serious downfall - must find a replacement "treat" that does not have a serious down-side.

4. I need to have a goal, a prize, and be accountable.

Those are the big four, I think, for me. And I think I've got the accountability issue down - at the risk of boring everyone to tears, I think I will post every Wednesday with my progress.

So next week, the saga begins...Mama Drama vs. Thunder Thighs! The battle of my middle age...

And Yesterday I Ran Into an Acura - Weight loss story #3

And it had nothing to do with closing my eyes or avoiding a glimpse of my hips.

It had everything to do with the Acura not seeing me and making a left hand turn right in front of me.

Sigh. One minute you're tootling along, the next minute you're babbling to a Patrolman about how you don't need a tow truck because the car actually started, which is how you got it out of the middle of the street, despite the fact that you were confused for a moment because the impact knocked the car into neutral and you didn't notice right away, but you figured it out and now you'll just call your sister for the great auto body shop she used when she rear-ended a Buick... Blah, blah, blah. Adrenaline turns me into an idiot. The Patrolman seemed to understand and just nodded.

No, the kids weren't in the car - I'd just dropped them off. And yes, I'm fine, thanks for asking. Extremely stiff and sore, and driving a rental car like my Great Aunt Mumsie, but I'm fine.

And in case you were wondering, the VW ads are extremely accurate. You know the ones? Where they're having an inane conversation and out a nowhere a car appears right in their path and they have just enough time to say "Oh sh-!" and the rest of the bad language is covered by the sound of the impact? That was me, yesterday.

So all of this is leading up to my excuse...I am still formulating my weight loss strategy, and I think I may have cracked the code. But due to the recent cracking of my car, I'm going to delay a bit before I start banging the "open your eyes and slim your thighs" drum, if you don't mind. But I do believe I have a plan...more soon.

On to Plan B: Weight loss story #2

My status so far:

1. Personal trainers = not for the chubby and cheap.

2. Getting up at 5:00am to jog: not for any human mother. I couldn't remember what planet I was on at 5:00am this morning, let alone that I was supposed to go running.

Next steps: Back to the drawing board for a penny-pinching, no-sleep-sacrificing solution.

I'm doing well on the potato chips though, and I've actually made brown rice!!

One step at a time...

Today, I Ran Into a Pole: Weight-loss story #1

Smacked my head hard and nearly knocked myself over. Felt like a total ass, of course, because people saw me.

I was dropping the girls off at preschool.  And I hit the dumb pole because I had my eyes closed - I didn’t want to see my pear-shaped reflection in the glass doors I was walking towards. So like a colossal idiot I had the bright idea to close my eyes. “If I can’t see you, you’re not there!” Good weight loss strategy. Little hard on the face, though.

So I’ve set aside the next hour to research my plan of attack. I need to find a gym or trainer or something! Something close – someplace I can run to in the morning for aerobics, and then work out on weights and then run back. I’ll do it before the girls get up. Or, maybe more like before the Man leaves for work. That’ll buy me a little more time. And I know how to eat right, I just need to do it. And conveniently I just polished off the last of the potato chips with lunch, so one less bad thing in the house.

This is good. This is doable. I’m totally ready this time! I can do this!!  I’ll check out the gyms tomorrow, but to get started, I’ll go running in the morning, just to get in the habit.

Perfect! I’ve got a plan. I’m good to go! Okay, everybody, wish me luck!!